The 1717 'Peter the Great' and his scandalous house-wrecking in London

Imagine the ultimate Airbnb guest from hell. Peter the Great didn't just visit London; he treated his temporary mansion like a frat house on a bender.

He and his rowdy entourage spent their nights having wheelbarrow races through the owner’s prize-winning hedges and using expensive portraits for target practice. They trashed the place, leaving behind ruined floors and shredded curtains.

The bill for the damages was insane, but Peter had peak "Main Character" energy. He wasn't there for tea; he was there to party like a Tsar, consequences be damned.

Wait, did the Tsar actually pay for all that mess?

Peter didn't reach for his royal wallet. In a classic "do you know who I am?" move, he basically ghosted the bill, leaving the homeowner, John Evelyn, absolutely devastated over his ruined topiary.

Evelyn had to beg King William III for the cash. The British Treasury eventually coughed up over £350—a literal fortune back then—just to cover the "Tsar-nado" aftermath.

It was the ultimate diplomatic cleanup. The government paid the "oopsie" fee just to keep Russia as an ally, proving that if you're a big enough deal, you can trash a mansion and let the taxpayers handle the receipts.

Was Russia really that important or was the King just a pushover?

Definitely not a pushover—just a savvy businessman. Peter was the 'it-boy' of the 1690s, dragging Russia into the modern age, and everyone wanted a piece of that potential.

King William III needed Russian hemp and timber for his navy—the literal backbone of England's power. If paying for ruined gardens kept the supply lines open, it was a bargain.

Plus, Peter had a massive ego. Offending him over a repair bill might have pushed Russia to team up with the French. In royal drama, £350 was a small price to keep an unpredictable 'frenemy' close.

So England's entire global flex was basically sponsored by Russian hemp?

Pretty much. England was the "Queen of the Seas," but she was totally dependent on her messy Russian boyfriend for supplies. Hemp wasn't just for rope; it was the high-tech fiber of the 1600s.

Without it, sails don't catch wind and anchors don't hold. Russia had the premium supply, and they knew it. If Peter cut them off, the British fleet would have become a collection of expensive, floating paperweights.

William III wasn't being nice; he was paying a "subscription fee" to keep his global empire from literally falling apart at the seams.

Why didn't England just grow their own hemp instead of paying Peter?

England tried to be an "independent girl," but their soil just didn't have the range. High-quality hemp needs a very specific, brutal climate—freezing winters and swampy summers—that Russia basically trademarked.

Growing it in the UK was like trying to grow luxury silk in a backyard. The local stuff was weak and brittle, and you don't want your "main character" navy held together by craft-store twine during a hurricane.

It was easier to just pay the "subscription" to Peter than to deal with the messy, back-breaking labor of processing it themselves. They chose the "buy it now" option to stay on top.